One of the toughest contradictions I had to deal with was the fleeting feelings of anger and vengeance, only to be replaced with pure guilt after I say something or stood up for myself.
It’s like, I was so mad at first the wrongdoers “won” over me. Then, I feel bad for getting back at them.
I let it go.
I acknowledge the contradiction by simply knowing that I have humility and that I am a peaceful, loving person. Sure, I stand up for myself and I’d be the first to admit that I’ve tons of ugly thoughts in my head.
But at least, I always ultimately do the right thing and not commit stupid shit.
I may feel bad, but at least I am feeling at home, not in jail.