Member-only story
Don’t Try To Be Happy, Just Try To Be Better
When we get triggered and start to feel a little sense of discomfort that leads to all sorts of unpleasant emotions, be it rage, sadness and even depression, our immediate response is usually, “I need to be happy now.”
That’s actually not a good thing.
Why? Because it is overwhelming.
It’s like trying to attain nirvana, to be someone you’re not, to reach a destination while not knowing the route.
What your response should be instead: “I want to be better now.”
Being better is but a tiny step.
It’s an improvement nonetheless.
It’s a training exercise.
Here’s the kicker: You don’t get to actually feel better all the time.
Here’s a scale my friend handed to me.
Notice the scary, ugly emotions in the downward spiral.
For whatever stage you’re in, just aim to be better. But then notice again even if you get better, you’re still feeling an ugly emotion. E.g. From jealousy to hatred/rage.
That’s the point. It is still better.
As said, it’s training.
Take it step by step, day by day.
One day, you’ll be a lot better.
