21 Things Guys Won’t Tell Girls

  1. “I know we’re good friends and that we’ve a meaningful, platonic friendship, but I’d so bang you if I had the chance.”
  2. “And I think that’s perfectly fine. It’s just sex.”
  3. “You do look fat in that dress.”
  4. “You have indeed gained weight.”
  5. “I kind of actually agree with your boyfriend when he said you’re acting like a bitch…”
  6. “I truly think you’re in the wrong here and that you should stop being a whiny brat who’s covering up her insecurities with dumb excuses only spoiled princesses would use.”
  7. “Your makeup is horrible.”
  8. “Stop trying so hard to take selfies! No matter what angle you pose with, you still don’t look good.”
  9. “Babe! You should totally watch out yourself and ignore all my feelings. Please go ahead and date that other guy! I only want you to be happy! I am totally fine with crying my eyes out every night before I go to bed as I think about losing you.”
  10. “I’ve a ton of anger issues and that may really scare you one day if you piss me off. Heck, I may slap you really, really hard.”
  11. “I really wish I can punch you in the face and get away with it.”
  12. “Why yes! I do indeed look at other women and fantasize about having sex with them or even having a relationship with them!”
  13. “Why yes! Your friend is actually kind of hotter than you are.”
  14. “I was close to setting your hair on fire when you were asleep.”
  15. “My hobbies include infidelity.”
  16. “You were kind of bad in bed babe.”
  17. “And I’ve had way better.”
  18. “If you don’t think that I am hot and good-looking with all these beefed up muscles you must be blind bitch!”
  19. “If the pregnancy test shows positive, I am so running away, tonight.”
  20. “Well I am going to foot the bill now, but it’d be actually super awesome if you paid half you know… ya fucking cunt.”
  21. “I came up with nicknames for you. They’re: Miss Difficult, Cunty, Bitch Face and Self-entitled Whore.”

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My name is Alden Tan and I’m sick of bullshit in the personal development space thanks to the pretentious people out there. I love writing and I’m also a Bboy.


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