I always sort of had an interest in the idea of the first date way back then. I’ve had gone on many and I think most of us approach it wrongly.
Basically, we overthink the hell out of the first date. Then we screw it up. Kind of ironic huh? Considering that approaching women or dudes can already be so tough. Check this out! Some pointers.
1) Don’t try to fall in a love on the first date
I see a lot of people trying to do this. They want to fall in love badly on the first date. They hope, and they hope and they hope and they hope.
You’re not there to fall in love. You’re there to simply get to know someone better. You’re there to get to know each other through conversations. It’s impossible to fall in love so fast anyway. If you’re trying to fit your first date into a future you wish to have, you’re going to come across as trying too hard anyway.
Because there’s no way you can talk to each other then. Again, conversations are important on the first date.
3) You’re there to know that person as an equal
Nobody is better than anyone. Nobody is there to bully the other into their own school of thought.
4) You’re there to make a friend
Because it all starts with friendship. You’d want a relationship where you treat your partner as your best friend anyway, so you can talk shit and stuff after your sexuality dies off.
5) You’re there to have fun
6) Guys, send her home
It’s the gentleman thing to do.
7) Dress to impress
No, it’s not about, “I want them to see the real me. I want them to see what I am like everyday.” No one wants to stare at a fucking slop even if you’re the nicest dude on earth.
8) Guys, bring her to nice places and all
I remember talking to some dude who said on a first date, he brought her to some piece of shit food court and made her pay for her own food. He justified that he wanted to test her and make sure she was a down to earth girl who isn’t spoiled.
And he was wondering why he’s single.
It’s your first date. Your job is to kill it on the first impression. Whatever type of girl you have in mind, do your part and show that you’re at least capable.
9) Girls, offer to pay your half
Not required, but just offer. Guys like that shit.
10) Body odor must be dealt with beforehand
It’s not just about looks now. Bad smell is instant death.
Do what it takes to make sure your breath doesn’t stink. Don’t show up sweaty and shit too.
11) Throw aside your phones on the first date and concentrate
Check your shit later. If your date doesn’t put his or her phone aside, well, it goes to show how much they really care then.
12) Don’t show up with a friend
I don’t care if you think didn’t think it was actually considered a date or whatever.
Don’t show up with a friend or ask them to meet you while you’re at your prior appointment.
It’s not forthcoming and hence not cool at all. Give them the respect and pleasure of your time. It will not be enjoyable for anyone.
13) Make her friends like you
However, that said, if you ever find yourself in a situation where her friends are there, just make it your job to get her friends to like you. Give them the attention instead.
Once you do that, you got her. Instant approval. Trust me. I done this shit many times before.
Her friends liking you equates to her liking you. Works for girls too.
14) Don’t try to force the chemistry
It can’t ever be forced. It must be natural.
15) It doesn’t fucking matter if it’s called a date or not
You just do your best to have fun and vibe with that person. At least you know you gave your all. If you feel the chemistry, you’ll anyway. Nothing will get in the way then.
Heck, wouldn’t it suck more if you expected it to be a date and then later on she’s like, “Oh what? Let’s not misunderstand. That wasn’t a date.”
16) Look them in the eye when you talk
If anything, you don’t want to be misunderstood to be too aloof or even rude on the first date, like a pretentious douchebag.
17) Have zero expectations despite prior buildup
I am sure you two were texting each other first. Despite however good or bad it has been, lower your expectations.
You simply can never tell what you’re going to get. No one is a mind reader.
18) Nothing is ever so bad that you’ll die from it, so chill
I once prepared to go out with a girl and brought her to the beach. I planned a romantic walk and all.
When we arrived, I had diarrhea. I had to run to the loo for a long time.
I felt really stupid about it. But after that, it was all good. We could still talk after that.
See? Nothing is ever so bad. So chill already.
19) It’s a privilege to be a friend
So many people complain that they end up in the “friendzone” as if it’s a bad thing.
There’s no such thing as the friendzone. That’s only a conclusion weak people come up with in their head.
It’s okay to be their friend. In fact, it’s a privilege. The question is: Did you express yourself fully so that they know you’re romantically interested in them?
So try your best. If anything, just relax. You made a friend. You don’t want to be their enemy do you?
20) Again, just have fun
As with all things to do with life, this piece of advice needs to be repeated.