20 Things I Wish I Knew When I Was 20

A list post on twenties life lessons for none other than adults in their twenties! Truth be told, I wrote this because others were doing it. It’s not very original, but I had fun writing it nonetheless. It was received pretty well. Here it is again since the restart of my blog. I hope it helps you, even if you aren’t in your twenties.

1) Don’t settle down with someone so early. Because 20 is actually a really young age. And even though you feel like you really like that certain someone while courting them, that feeling doesn’t last. The thrill, excitement, romance and love will dwindle down significantly. You will also meet others, and you will be tempted. This is probably one of the hardest and most profound twenties life lessons.

2) The friends you have then may not be your friends forever. I’ve personally fallen out with about maybe 5 friends since I was 20. We were actually close, really close, but shit happened along the way. People change, and that change could be in you. Be willing to let go of friendships that are toxic.

3) Read as much as you can. Because reading books is a real art. Reading can not only better your language, but also boost your confidence in society. Read at least one book a week. Also, create a catalogue of blogs to follow and read them like it’s an empowering activity. That beats random social media surfing.

4) Learn things systematically by being patient. Whatever you want to learn and achieve, do it with small steps. Don’t rush and hope for an overnight transformation. They don’t happen. Plus, you’d wish you did it in small steps as you wonder why you still haven’t achieved what you wanted years later. And trust me, time will fly.

5) Don’t waste time and energy caring about what others think. Because they aren’t real and you’ll laughing at yourself later when you let such bullshit hold you back.

6) Get over your breakups as quickly as you can. Because life is too short to feel pain from the past and over a single person.

7) You only feel your age according to the people you surround yourself with. It’s easy to think you’re getting older just because your age goes up. But whether you feel young or old is largely dependant on who you’re with. Hang out with cool people who want to explore life, and you’d feel young everyday. Hangout with people who try to force feed society’s ideals of acting your age, and you’d feel like you should be on a wheelchair any time soon.

8) Lose your virginity. A friend told me once, “Demystify sex.” And I agree. Let it go once and all. That way, you won’t spend your time wondering how it’s like and trust me on this, you’re going to realize that superficial looks alone don’t make for a good experience in bed. Real connection with an astounding personality does. This will also really help you stop allowing people you think are attractive to have power over you.

If you took my words seriously, you’d realize this isn’t about merely hooking up and fucking around.

9) Learn to appreciate being alone. Because it’s awesome. Go for a walk alone. Eat alone. Go to the library and just sit alone. And you’ll never feel like you’re really alone. Just start on something.

10) Exercise real control over credit cards. Go ahead. Apply for them for the benefits can be awesome. But be firm in how and what you spend on. Expenses can come in like a torrent otherwise, especially when you’re drunk.

11) College, institutions and even religion can never beat experience, your best teacher. Hold on to them and don’t let others’ ideas or beliefs overwrite them.

12) Let your friends make their own mistakes. It’s essential for them to grow as a person. You can’t fix anyone. They’ve to do it themselves.

13) Start your business today. You don’t need an amazing product or whatever. See how you can add value and help others. Get fucking good at it. Eventually you can find that convergence of helping others and making money from it. It’ll be a lot easier since you’re good at it by then.

14) Get abs. It’s easier when young. Lose weight by eating less. Tone up by working out. Stay fit yo.

15) People still fuck up the simplest of things. Some people, for whatever reason, can never be on time or even own up to the mistakes they obviously made. Don’t be too surprised when your friends or even family let you down over shit you think could be avoided. Alas, this means people evade simple things like common sense or being nice just to be bullies.

16) Learn body language and touch up on proper EQ. They matter. You can have a heart of gold or the best of intentions, but no one is going to know if you don’t look or act the part. They may even judge you harshly. Don’t let misjudgement destroy opportunities. I must have unknowingly pushed away like 5 girls who were interested in me because I didn’t know even what I was doing right or wrong. Oh and there’re people out there who will come up with manipulative bullshit just to make use of you. Learn so you can protect yourself!

17) There’s a difference between being nice and being weak. More often than not, nice people allow themselves to be weak because they want to show that they’re nice i.e. not bad people. You can be nice and strong. You just have to stand up for yourself. Being nice doesn’t mean you have to say yes to everything.

18) Get over being pissed and frustrated. You won’t be pissed about the same things in the future. It’s called mellowing out.

19) You can fun in your weekends without alcohol or partying. They get old pretty fast. You might as well save some money.

20) Shit never stops happening. My dad died. My friend died. My aunt has cancer today. But be happy. It’s your choice. Being too alert or paranoid isn’t a life at all. Help others when you can. Be in the know life’s like that, but at the end of the day, be happy.

I hope you took away something from my perspective on what is partly something of a big whole, twenties life lessons.

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